Monthly Archives: September 2015

When Angels Leave This Life

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Survivors Guilt

by Christie Perkins

Untitled designI have three contacts in my phone I can no longer use. Anita, Sheree, and now Lori. All cancer friends. I can’t bring myself to erase these contacts, as if having them in my phone somehow keeps them close to me.

A flood of memories rush in when I see their name flash across as I’m scrolling for another contact. For a brief moment my heart goes soft and I am touched by their goodness. The memory of their smile greets me in this moment. I can almost hear their voice, their laughter comforting me and telling me that though there are hard times there is much sunshine.

I just can’t push “erase.” Continue reading →

Heavenly Hashbrowns

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by Christie Perkins

Heavenly Hashbrowns (1)They were just hashbrowns. How hard could they be?

Well, since I was newly married and highly unexperienced in meal dealing (but wanted to impress my beau with my presumed amazing cooking skills… ahem, yes, presumed) I offered to take the hashbrown portion of the meal.

And that was the first wrong step.

My guy helped peel and cube the potatoes. Now, in any ordinary circumstance I would have turned to the skimp-on-valuable-time method (thank you frozen bag section). But, since we were camping, a bag of potatoes was our current resource. Continue reading →

Grateful for the Handless Stinkbug Twirl

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Let the Little Things Change You

by Christie Perkins

We live for inspirational moments. Well I do, anyway.

Sometimes I will seek out inspirational quotes or messages online and find great delight in its effect on me. I rerun it over and over in my head.

But I especially love it when the day’s forward motion strikes an inspirational moment and I’m changed for the better. My own personal inspirational moment.

2015 Aug PLeasant Creek Campground 025So, I’ve had a thought that keeps pegging me: I wonder how many times I miss some inspirational moment? I miss it because I’m too stuck on the mundane task ahead of me. I miss it because I’m too busy thinking about what’s next. And I miss it because I fail to think about how it can apply to me.

And sometimes it catches me by surprise. I remember one instance nearly a decade ago that still influences me. It was such a little thing with big impact.

Continue reading →

How Volcano Day Warmed My Soul

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Cancer and Volcano Eruptions

by Christie Perkins

It was just the 5th grade volcano day.

For any other parent it would have been one of those dreaded weekend cram sessions of twirling homework hurling. But for me, life was erupting and spewing fresh hot lava down new paths.

Yep. Good old cancer diagnosis blew 5 days before volcano day.volcano day 012

The week I was diagnosed with cancer my life erupted and everything came to a halt. It seemed that all I could see was the lava flow of cancer. It was consuming me. Not that I was depressed, necessarily, but I was overwhelmed by the details of it.

One day I’m planning the sweet details of my own life and the next day my health care concerns are charring in life’s little fire. It’s like those sugared almonds I have trouble with. In one minute it’s looking good and then then next moment they are eyepopping black-ish. It’s the elite cancer lava plan I just got thrown into. Continue reading →